Ever wanted an insight into the life of a beauty blogger? Well for today’s post Mr Beautiful Truth has given us his top 9 reasons why it is hard working living with a beauty blogger.
Make-up f*cking everywhere!
My house looks like it was attacked by a makeup terrorist. I am constantly reminded of the atrocities by the makeup left on doors, light switches and even pillowcases. I believed Sinéad in vain when she told me, “OH, that’ll wash out!” Don’t get me started on fake tan…
When Sinéad refers to other beauty bloggers, she calls them by their screen name. “Cherry Sue “said she tried this” or “Beauty Nook ‘ said that foundation was nice”. What ever happened to people’s real names? Are these people on the run? Sometimes I feel she’s going to throw Maverick & Goose into the mix!
An Post deliveries
On the rare occasion that I am at home during the day, I am constantly barraged with a mountain of deliveries that arrive in the form of samples at our door. At this stage, myself and the Postman are on a first name basis although I think the postman suspects me of being a secret drag queen even though all the makeup is marked for Sinéad.
Running a blog isn’t easy, you have to type up these things called blog posts appearently. With that in mind, most of Sinéad’s are typed at night in front of the TV so when I sit down to relax, it sometimes sounds like I am in the secretarial bullpen on Mad Men!
“I’m going to an event!”
The 1916 Rising… that was an event. The Moon landing… that was an event. The fall of the Berlin Wall… that was an event. Some company having a night to launch an underwater hair dryer is NOT an event!
I don’t even know the proper name for them but all I know is that these hairclips are left everywhere! In the shower, in the bed and even in the filter of the washing machine! I have picked up more hair clips than I’ve had hot dinners!
I understand that to take proper photos, you need to have the right equipment such as a good camera, a camera stand, studio lights etc. However, when all these are left out and your friends call over for a cup of tea, it sends out the completely wrong message to lads as to what we get up to behind closed doors.
The last time I checked, Crown brushes were used if you wanted to paint the house. When I hear Sinéad saying she was going to try out a new set of brushes, I think to myself, “Nice one, the kitchen is finally going to get the lick of paint it so badly needs.”
There’s nothing in the shops
When Sinéad arrives home exhausted after a day of fruitless shopping and says, “There’s nothing in the shops!”, my mind immediately conjures up images of a dystopian landscape of empty shelves, deserted isles and abandoned shopping centres. How could there be nothing in the shops? That’s impossible!
And finally…”Can you do my back?”
Nothing sends the fear of God into any man more than the sight of a tanning glove and a bottle of Cocoa Brown coupled with those immortal words.
A close runner up to “Can you do my back?” is “Make sure it looks even!” Next time, do your own f*cking back!